Life

Michael Jackson, R.I.P.

One of the axioms of life I have long drilled into my children is, "It's ok to be rich,  but never be famous."

As Hollywood repeatedly demonstrates, adults are unable to handle the massive adulation that comes with fame.  Children don't have a prayer.  The list of child stars that have come to a bad end is seemingly endless.  Why would any parent subject their child to that kind of life?

Michael Jackson never stood a chance.  But is it only me that senses a massive level of hypocrisy going on with his death.  Hasn't Michael Jackson's major role in our culture for the last decade been to serve as the butt of jokes on late night television.  The media has been relentless in hounding this poor kid.  Now the same media is giving him the adulation he so desperately needed,  just a little too late.

So Michael, I hope you rest in the peace you never had in life.  And mothers,  don't let your sons grow up to be famous.

Kodachrome Basin State Park

If you head east from Bryce Canyon National Park along Scenic Byway Route 12,  you will soon come to Kodachrome Basin State Park.  The park gets its name from a National Geographic expedition in the forties.  The Eastman Kodak company,  at the state’s request,  gave the state permission to use the name of its Kodachrome color slide film for the park.

What an honor!  To have some of the best photographers on earth come to an area and name it after your color film.  Little did Eastman Kodak suspect that within eighty years, most children would not otherwise know what Kodachrome was,  much less what color slides were,  or, for that matter,  what photographic film was.  It would have been fun to tell the executives of the time that most children take pictures with their telephones these days,  but at least your flagship film’s name is immortalized in an incredible state park in Utah. [Since I returned, I have learned that Kodak is discontinuing their Kodachrome film.]

The name tells you a great deal about Kodachrome Basin.  Ansel Adams could, no doubt, have done wonderful things here,  but color is really the thing.   The red sandstones from different ages combine with the desert varnish and the other rock formations to splash color all over the landscape.

Trails here are good fun.  When they say a trail is one mile long,  this is a horizontal measurement.   It does not include the vertical.  A flatlander tourist will think a mile is not far,  and not bother to take water.  Big mistake.  After you’ve climbed the first couple hundred feet (think climbing the steps in a twenty story building) and round a corner to see your car far below,  you begin to suspect that perhaps you should have come better prepared.   Also,  sandstone in the summer sun makes an excellent frying pan,  so hats and sun block are also a very good idea.

As I said earlier,  Utah state parks seem to be understated in their signs,  and the standards are those for local residents.   So if a sign says a trail is strenuous,  take it seriously,  and if says the trail is very strenuous,  content yourself with a picture of the sign.

 An obviously safe trail,  no sign needed.

Likewise,  a perfectly safe and well-used viewpoint. 

 So do you really want to know what kind of trail follows these signs?

This trail climbs about 100 feet and is about a foot wide.  I'm not sure what the options to staying on it are.

 Tactful, if you can't fit through the gate, you probably don't want to go on the trail.

 How did my car get way the heck down there?

 TH stands for trailhead,  which is where you want to go if black clouds suddenly appear overhead.  Fortunately,  I was hiking this trail on a Thursday,  so I made it back down.

 Lest I mislead,  there are many rewards for hiking the trails of Kodachrome

 

Southern Utah

 

The first thing to understand about Southern Utah is that it is one big glorious park.  From the North Rim of the Grand Canyon in the South, to Bryce and Zion in the West, to Arches and Canyonlands in the East, Southern Utah is one fantastic park.  And I use the word fantastic as in fantasy.  It is where God let His baby angels play in the mud.
 
Now technically,  Southern Utah is divided into three types of land: national parks, state parks, and other land.   The difference is one of management.  National parks have lots of signs cluttering up the landscape telling you all the things you can do that will cause you to be severely fined or jailed.  Signs in Utah state parks are more like guidelines.  Their tone is along the lines of ‘we wouldn’t recommend doing that because you’ll probably die.’   Other lands in Southern Utah include all manner of national forests and BLM (Bureau of Land Management) land, ranches, and other private property.  These are readily distinguished from the national and state parks by the ATV tracks.
 
Off-roading is the national sport of Southern Utah.  ATVs, dune buggies, and all manner of 4WD vehicles tear merrily across the landscape. Utah has officially turned hundreds of miles of old mining roads into ATV trails.  ATVs make a lot of noise,  so you should pay attention to where you are pitching camp.  On the plus side,  they scare the bears away.  And no doubt their tracks, whipping up and down the soft rock,  will someday fossilize giving future archaeologists all sorts of material for Ph.D. theses.
 
The second major thing you need to know about Southern Utah is that it is populated by Mormons.  That is, members in good standing of the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints.  If I had to use one word to describe Mormons,  it would be “nice.”  Other words that come to mind are friendly, wholesome, and, of course, fertile.  If you like cute little babies,  this is the place for you.  But even the Mormons have failed to populate this region.  Most of the towns range from five hundred to two thousand people.  And forget finding bars and liquor stores,  but every town,  no matter how small,  has a bakery and ice cream parlor.
 
Now the fun part about Southern Utah is these same Mormons are in charge of the state parks.   Since they think nothing of climbing a mountain to get the morning paper, they assume everyone else is part mountain goat as well.  Where the national parks have all sorts of rules and regulations,  the state parks think nothing about putting a path across the top of a two foot wide fin of sandstone with two hundred foot drops on either side.  (Oh, and the locals will casually wander across these things with their little kids running willy nilly on ahead.  “Now Tommy,  don’t knock the nice man off the cliff.”)  This and the fact they are much less crowded make the state parks much more fun.  The moral here is that when the locals do put a sign up,  you would do well to regard it seriously.

 

Typical State Park Trail - Kodachrome State Park

 

 
And although the national parks encompass some amazing sights,  the state parks are equally amazing,  as is just about every inch of Southern Utah.  With some of the clearest air on Earth (one hundred mile plus visibility is common), you will find vistas which are simply beyond belief wherever you go.  The fact is,  if you took any square mile of Southern Utah and dropped it anywhere else on Earth,  you would create a famed park and tourist attraction.
 
One final thing to understand about Southern Utah is there are not a lot of paved roads.  The Colorado Plateau is filled with sandstone hoodoos, volcanic cones and flows, geologic faults and folds, slot canyons,  and every manner of geologic formation, none of which are conducive to building roads.  
 
For example,  the town of Boulder was the last town in the United States to have its mail delivered by pack mule.  In the thirties, the WPA built a road to it by following the same technique the locals use for paths in their state parks,  they built a two-lane road along the top of a ridge with no shoulders and severe drops on either side.
 

 Scenic Route 12 to Boulder

 

Local roads are designated as Scenic Byways, although that’s almost redundant in this area, and as Scenic Backways. The distinction is you can navigate a Scenic Byway with a car,  but make sure your brakes are adjusted and your tires are good.   A scenic backway means you have a good chance of traversing the road in an off-road four wheel drive vehicle,  as long as it doesn’t rain.  If it rains,  all bets are off no matter what you’re driving.  You should not even think about going down Backways with a regular car. There are many more miles of Backways than there are of Byways,  and they take you to some very interesting places.
 
In the following sections,  I will review some of the state parks,  national parks, and scenic byways of Southern Utah.

 

Next: Kodachrome Basin State Park

Expelled

Has anyone seen any good movies lately?   I mean like ones released by Hollywood.  There have been perhaps three movies I've even been vaguely tempted to go to in the last year.

Well, there's one coming out that has my interest up.  Ben Stein's Expelled, No Intelligence Allowed.   It is about our institutions of higher learning and how anyone who doesn't accept their version of the truth gets burned at the stake.

Science, for the last several hundred years,  has been based on the scientific method and mathematical proofs.  Experiments must be rigorous, controlled, and repeatable.  The mathematics can be easily checked.   

Science in the last decade has taken on a whole new meaning.  Science has become what the high priests say it is.   Anyone who argues is attacked on a personal level and every attempt is made to destroy them.   Evidence, mathematical proofs,  controls, and facts have all given way to political correctness.  Reporters for the major media,  having no education whatsoever in science,  accept what they are fed by the high priests.

Global warming is an excellent example.  The New York Times declares the debate is over.  That most credible scientists accept the theory of man-caused global warming.  That anyone who even points out man-caused global warming is just a theory is accused of being a denier and in the pocket of the big oil companies.  Any true scientific research which might contradict this dogma is simply not funded, and those responsible for trying to do the research have their tenure denied and their reputations attacked.

I have not seen the movie Expelled,  but I certainly intend to see it.  In it,  writer, comedian, and financial guru Ben Stein looks at another one of the sacred cows,  the theory of evolution,  and how those who dare question it are destroyed.  Even if someone should point out that Evolution is only a theory,  a point which Darwin himself would readily acknowledge,  they are destroyed.

America is rapidly becoming a third world country.  Our currency is becoming worthless and our workforce uneducated.   If we are to pull out of this tailspin,  we must turn our schools and universities back into what they once were,  world leaders in education and research.  If no scientist dare question the politically correct dogma,  we are simply back to the dark ages.

Expelled comes out April 18th.  I hope it hits harder than the rather slow moving trailer on the website.  It's an important message.  Check it out. 

Ben Stein's Blog

The Bear

When I was very small,  with no understanding of things,  I listened to it every night in fear.   The thump, thump, thump of its footsteps,  coming nearer and nearer.  In the dark,  my head buried in my pillow, I knew it was coming ever closer, and when it arrived it would kill me in some horrible fashion.

Night after night,  I could hear the bear.  Its steady pace coming ever closer.   I  tried to imagine how many footsteps away it was.  My earliest memories were thinking it must be a hundwed steps away.   As I grew older,  my estimate grew faster than a government budget.  The last firm estimate I remember making was a million gazillion.  Eventually,  I learned what the bear was,  and I thought I had lost my fear of it.

Then at 3 a.m. on New Year’s Day,  the footsteps stopped.   I knew the bear had arrived and all my childhood fears flooded back in an instant.   I have never been so afraid in my life.

They took me to the hospital,  and after thirty-six hours,  the bear started walking again.  I was very relieved to hear his steady trudge.  Yet I know he is much closer now,  and I do not think I will ever lose my fear of him again.

Lake Tahoe to Death Valley

After dropping the family at SFO,  I headed for Lake Tahoe and spent a couple days exploring.  Then I headed down to Vegas by way of the Eastern Sierras and Death Valley.  Pix are here.

SIGGRAPH 2007

Following my sainted grandmother’s advice,  that a family going to a scientific conference together helps strengthen family ties,  the four of us climbed on an airplane and flew to San Diego for the 2007 Annual Conference of the Association for Computing Machinery’s Special Interest Group on Computer Graphics (SIGGRAPH 07).

Regrettably,  Pieter, my oldest son,  couldn’t make it because of final exams and college responsibilities.   This is the first family trip he’s missed and we missed him,  but he and I had attended SIGGRAPH before,  and he had been on several trips to California as a child. 

After the conference,  Jessie, Mike, Pat, and I drove up the coast to San Francisco, stopping along the way to see Muscle Beach,  Hollywood, Cal Tech, the Santa Monica Pier,  the Big Sur, and Monterey.   Pictures of the conference and the trip to the Bay area are here.   Pictures from San Francisco and the Muir Woods are here.

I admit to ulterior motives.   One reason to show the kids California is to make sure they never move there.   Just driving through traffic in LA and Silicon Valley should be enough to convince almost anyone.   Also the trip allowed them to see the consequences of an out-of-control Nanny state.

This trip may not have worked out as I had planned.  First, coastal California is a wonderful place to get away from the summer heat.  While the rest of the country was undergoing a heat wave,  we were cool and comfy in California.   Second,  showing Jess Cal Tech was a major mistake.   She,  like so many children,  always wanted to attend Hogwarts.  And frankly,  watching the fruits and nuts in California is some of the best people watching in the world.

I’m tempted to get into a rant here about all the obvious bad things we saw in California,  but why spoil a family moment with my conservative politics.  Suffice it to say that after dropping the family off at the airport to fly home to start school,  I drove from San Francisco to Sacramento.   As I drove down the crowded  highway,  the first sight that greeted my eyes were the state government buildings  coming into view across a large swamp.   At first,  I thought that was an adequate metaphor, but then I saw the sign:

CAUTION CAMPERS, VANS, AND TRUCKS
GUSTY WINDS NEXT SEVEN MILES

Amen to that.

The Growth of Religions

Thought you might find this interesting, although a little misleading.   All those “missions abroad” in Christianity vs. “conquests” for Islam seem to have included the “missions”  attached to the Spanish Conquistadors and American Manifest Destiny.   Some of the native tribes might have viewed those as not quite peaceful missions.

Also,  by leaving Christianity as an ideally homogenous whole,  it neglected all the horrible religious wars fought in the name of different sects of Christianity.   Of course, the same is true for Islam which schismed immediately on the death of Mohammed.

But interesting none the less.

At Least Mary and Joseph Found a Stable

In case the normal Christmas stress has you down,  just think, it could be a lot worse.

As in the United State's fifth busiest airport:

"Denver International Airport is scheduled to reopen at noon today after a 45-hour closure - the longest in the airport's history - resulted in approximately 2,000 canceled flights"

Or in Heathrow Airport, London

"Heathrow bosses faced fury from stranded passengers as thousands were left outside in freezing conditions.

Up to 70,000 people were caught up in a fresh set of cancellations as the fog-bound airport axed almost two-thirds of its flights.

Many opted not to travel to the airport, but about 40,000 passengers were believed to be stuck there, facing conditions one described as a "living hell".

There were huge queues of tired, frustrated and increasingly angry travellers - many with children - at Heathrow and Gatwick, many forced into emergency tents.

At Heathrow the tents were quickly packed full and the queue outside stretched for several hundred yards. BAA staff gave out woolly hats and gloves."

So when you're grumbling about wrapping Christmas presents, or about the in-laws coming over,  say a prayer for the Christmas Traveler.

Miracle on 34th Street

One of the cable channels is playing the classic movie Miracle on 34th Street during prime time for several consecutive nights this week.  How wonderful,  I thought, to give such exposure to one of the great Christmas classics,  especially in these times of truly disgusting movies such as Borat.   Something for the whole family to watch.

So I watched it.   The movie was as good as I remember.  But the commercials...  One was for Erectile Dysfunction and another for controlling transmission of Herpes during sex.

Does anyone but me see anything wrong with this?  What were they thinking?  Perhaps that no child raised on today's cable television and Hollywood movies would ever sit through Miracle on 34th Street,  so the only ones watching it would be the fifty somethings trying to remember when the world was much more innocent and full of hope?